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Scientists say that our brain is trained to always be on the lookout for the negative. If a fly lands on one of the 10 deliciously looking cupcakes, we will concentrate on avoiding one “ruined” cupcake, and not on enjoying the 9 good ones. This negative-comes-first-mechanism has helped us survive for thousands of years. However, over the course of history there...

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5 Things to Stop Caring about today to feel happier tomorrow!A Zen student once asked his teacher, “Master, what is enlightenment?
The master replied, “When hungry, eat. When tired, sleep. When it is time, let go.

Need ideas of things to let go of?

Here are 5 Things to Stop Caring about today to feel happier tomorrow!

1. Stop Caring If You Are Enough.

The main idea behind it is pretty simple: Whatever goals you would like to achieve, whoever you want to be: You Are Enough.

So often we let other people or situations convince us that this is not true, that we are lacking something. And that this ‘something’ is preventing us from being happy. If we could just be a little taller, thinner, smarter, richer or more attractive, everything would be great. Our problems would magically disappear. Our life would be much easier and more satisfying.

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Want to enjoy the better life? Read these 33 smart rules to live buy for more joyful and fulfilling life!Is there something that you would like to improve about your life?

Here are small ideas on how you can do this. Maybe one of these ideas will speak to you and make your day a little more zen.

A to Z(en) of a Better Life

A- Ask. Ask for help when you need it. Ask for support. Ask and it will be given to you. It is that simple.

B- Build momentums. An amazing life is a sum of little, everyday decisions to take action, when it was easier to do nothing.

C- Create your own opportunities. Waiting for the right time is a myth created by people who did not feel like taking action. Don't follow their lead. Give more than you planned to.

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Can you increase happiness like a muscle and experience more joy and fulfillment? What if you spend 10-15 minutes a day working on your "happiness muscle"?What if instead of working out in the gym we dedicated 10-15 minutes a day to increase our happiness? Would it not be great to train your mind and notice yourself becoming more positive, more satisfied with your life and eventually more successful?

It actually works in this exact order. Only now have the bright minds of positive psychology like Shawn Achor started to burst the bubble of “I need to work harder to be more successful, so that I can become happier.”

Many of us still live by this formula waiting for happiness to come. “I need to work harder on my relationships, to become a better parent, a better spouse, a better friend and, eventually, everyone will love and appreciate me”, “I need to work harder to get promoted and then I will be happy with my career”, “I need to work harder to make more money and then I will be able to retire, buy a beautiful beach home and live the life of my dreams”.

Don’t get me wrong, I am not saying that we should not work harder. I am saying that we should change the formula to

I need to work harder to increase my happiness right now”.

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Quick - what’s more important intuition or logic? You gut feeling says: intuition. But when you start thinking about it, your mind will tell you that logic is more reliable and makes more sense – because it’s logical. It’s great when your mind and your heart are aligned, but what happens when they point in the opposite directions? Can rationalizing actually hurt...

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Do you consider yourself to be a confident person? I did, until I've read a post by Steven Aitchison on 5 Weird Confidence Building Exercises. The first exercise he suggested was called the Wrong Shop exercise. This is how it works. You walk into a store and ask for something totally weird that the store doesn't sell. For example, you walk...

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“If someone isn't what others want them to be, the others become angry. Everyone seems to have a clear idea of how other people should lead their lives, but none about his or her own.” ― Paulo Coelho, The Alchemist   The young woman was walking on the beach, when she saw an old lady sleeping in a winter coat right on...

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How many things have you regretted doing in your life? I bet quite a few, just like everyone else. Well, below is my list of 7 things that I know I will never regret doing and this knowledge is actually empowering in so many ways. For example, it is nice to feel that you can not mess up (for a change)....

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I have noticed that there are two spontaneous reactions when it comes to dealing with negative people 1) we get mean and rude back or 2) we let them run all over us while boiling inside with righteous indignation. Neither of these options seems particularly attractive...This weekend I had a very frustrating incident. As I was getting into a taxi, the driver got distracted and started driving off without checking if I had closed the door. Can you imagine my shock when I had one leg inside the car and the car suddenly started moving? I literally jumped inside, but my ankle still got caught in the door. Besides an ugly bruise I got a piece of the driver’s mind about how long it takes for SOME people to get into a car. No “I’m sorry!” No “Are you ok?” Nothing! I am usually good at controlling my temper, but this time all I could think of was how much I want to smack this rude man and give him a piece of my mind about his manners.

Do you often let a rude taxi driver, an uncaring boss, an insensitive co-worker or an arrogant stranger ruin your day? Have you ever wondered why sometimes people purposely say or do mean things?

I could come up with 4 main reasons:

a) They try to overcompensate for their hurt Ego. Someone has hurt them in the past when they felt especially vulnerable and now they are trying to regain their power and self-confidence by hurting you.

b) They secretly fear that they have the same quality that they are making fun of. For example, if a person makes derogatory remarks about someone being overweight, they are most likely insecure about their own body and are afraid that people will notice it too.

c) They are deeply attached to their sufferings and failures. As weird as it may seem, many people refuse to let go of their negativity, because it brings some drama into their life and gives them something to worry about.

d) They crave attention and love. Just like teenagers when reaching a difficult age act out of spite to prove their own independence, adults defy social norms to get attention and a strong emotion out of you (even if it is a negative emotion).

How do you respond to mean people?

I have noticed that there are two spontaneous reactions when it comes to dealing with negative people 1) we get mean and rude back or 2) we let them run all over us while boiling inside with righteous indignation. Neither of these options seems particularly attractive.

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negative self-talkHave you ever had to say “I’m sorry” for something you said to another person? Yes? Then welcome to the club of conscious people who have the courage to admit their mistakes.

Although, I bet there is one person that you still owe an apology to… This person is YOU!

It is weird how attentive we are not to hurt other people’s feelings and how often we say the most offensive things to ourselves: “I can’t believe I have been so stupid”, “I’m a terrible person”, “I am such an idiot!

Have you ever apologized to yourself? Have you ever taken time to say “I’m sorry, I did not mean it”?
No? Me neither. Not once.

But today I thought maybe it is time we start treating ourselves with the same level of respect, compassion and understanding as we treat others? This includes being conscious about our self-talk and the thoughts we address to ourselves when feeling angry, upset or frustrated.

2 Things You Should Never Say To Yourself

(Also take time to read and re-read “10 Things You Should Never Say to People that You Like”. It might save you a lot of apologies in the future.)

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