I have a weird gift, which sometimes seems more like a curse. No matter how boring or uninteresting the topic of conversation is, I can not just start daydreaming or planning vacation in my mind. People talk, I listen.

This might be a great skill, but part of my problem is that weeks and even months later I remember most of the details that people cared to share with me: their astrological signs, their blood pressure, names of their pets. Sometimes I think that my brain is a huge store of bits and pieces of information (and not all of it can be defined as “useful”).

In general, I enjoy listening to people’s routines, hobbies, children, or their experiences. To me it is like a window into someone else’s life and I appreciate that a person is sharing it with me.

However, at times what is interesting to us, is not necessarily interesting to everyone we talk to. I know that I can talk for hours about psychological experiments, healthy eating, yoga, travelling, motivation, life of successful people, deserts or my niece. So unless you are REALLY interested in discussing these topics, please do not get me started.

I am sure that your too have your favorite topics that you are passionate about, but your enthusiasm and interests might not always be shared by every single person you talk to. That is why it helps to know when to end a conversation or change the topic.

Here are a few signs of boredom that you need to watch out for when talking to people:

1. Responding the same way over and over.

“Really?”, “Right”, “Yeah” “Uh-huh” – these tired replies accompanied with occasional nods, are usually indicators that people are not too engaged in the conversation. They might listen, because good manners are binding them to do so, but they really would like to talk about something else.
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Very often we find ourselves in situations when we have to point out other peoples’ mistakes or express our disagreement. Criticism is a tricky business, because very few people are receptive to it and even less people know how to offer it without being offensive or derogative. Basically if you learn this one skill – the world will be your oyster.

You will succeed at work, because your co-workers and employees will respect your opinion. Your friends will value your opinion and seek your advice. Many of your relationship problems will simply disappear, because you will be able to resolve conflicts and miscommunications constructively.

So how do you point out that your friend is making a mistake, without hurting their feelings? How do you give effective feedback to your co-workers and make them more amenable to taking on board your suggestions? And finally, how do you stop your own inner critique and refrain from judging yourself?

Here are 10 Steps to Expressing Constructive Criticism and to Being Heard:

1. Avoid Unnecessary Criticism

If you pay attention to dialogues carried on around you, you will soon come to realize that many times people criticize unnecessary. They generalize, make assumptions, and exaggerate. While those, who are being criticized feel hurt and become defensive. Do not be one of these people, who criticize easily. Whenever you are about to say something unpleasant to a person, stop and ask yourself “Why am I saying it?” What good will it do? If you have found at least 3 different, objective reasons to why you have to share this information then go ahead. Just do it wisely.

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Have you ever talked to someone and had a vague feeling that this person is not listening to you?

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