There are leaders that we eagerly follow, hang on their every word and come to them looking for guidance. Then there are bosses. You know – the annoying, close-minded, stubborn control freaks that everyone dislikes and complains about?

Taken out of context they could be wonderful people, loving husbands or wives, devoted fathers or mothers, and passionate golf-players.

But…

When it comes to leading, organizing and empowering people, bosses’ social status by far exceeds their leadership abilities.

Fortunately for us (and for the bosses) there is hope, because with the right guidance and dedication leadership skills can be developed and improved.

• So how do you take a mediocre boss and transform them into a Charismatic Leader?
• What are the main qualities that define inborn leaders that attract loyal followers wherever they go?
• What is the secret of their carefree success?

I found that at the base of any leadership success and charisma lay 3 Powerful Beliefs:

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Our life is a direct result of the choices that we have made at each point along the way and we do not always do a good job at deciding what is best for us.

If we all made sound judgments we would not act irrationally, engage in needless conflicts, forego gains in order to spite others, make impulsive purchases, marry wrong partners and wrongly invade other countries. But the truth is that we do all of the above without even realizing how much our decision-making mistakes are costing us.

Unfortunately, it is not always simple to make the right decision and behave ‘optimally’.
However, there are a few things that we can do to noticeably improve our decision making skills and reduce the number of less than perfect choices that we rightly call “mistakes”:

1. Consider ‘opportunity’ cost.

Making good decisions does not always mean weighting costs against benefits. You have to take into consideration the ‘opportunity cost’ or what you give up by choosing another option. For example, reading friends’ updates on facebook can be a form of enjoyment and relaxation, but this is the time you could be spending doing something way more enjoyable like playing badminton with a friend, writing for your blog or jogging.

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Every person has their unique, natural, God-given talents, positive traits of character and desire to contribute to the world in some way. Sometimes this inner goodness is temporary overshadowed by fears, harsh words and painful past experiences.

But it does not mean we should not try to see past people’s actions and limiting beliefs and try to bring out the best in every person we see.

I know, it is not your job, nor your duty to bring the best out in people, but take it from me it is a lot nicer to live in a world of bright, kind-hearted and compassionate people than deal with “ungrateful family members”, “hard-headed clients” and “slack co-workers”.

In fact, learning to bring out the best in other people is one of the best gifts that you can give yourself. True, it might not always be easy. It might not always be appreciated. It might not even work in some cases, but it does not mean we should stop trying.

Here is a little guide on how to do it:

1. Do not take negativity personally.

“Whenever anyone has offended me, I try to raise my soul so high that the offense cannot reach it.” – Rene Descartes

Can you think of a time when you were bubbling with joy and love for the whole world? You wanted to share it with everyone you met, right? Well, when people are overcome by negative feelings, they unintentionally share them with the world as well.

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